A family event at the Hoyles.

Update on progress

Well, I should provide an update I guess.  Dad began to marginally communicate with us on Christmas eve.  He has had a remarkable physical journey, that is for sure.

Grafts

Most notably, is his grafts.  Dad was burned 2nd and 3rd degree over 60% of his body.  Roughly from the top of his boots to his mid chest on front and shoulder blades on his back.  Of the 40% not burned, some of that was face, fingers, toes and so forth that was not good for grafting sites.  He relied on donor skin to take place while the other areas were waiting to regrow and be harvested again.

I've been told, and I am not  certain of the statistics, that about 65% of all grafts fail requiring them to be redone.  This can be for any number of reasons such as infection or just abrasions from movement after the application.

Dad has retained 100% of his grafts.

Infection and Kidney Failure

Around the 20th day of Dad's ICU time, he became very septic.  Had eColi in his blood, Staph in his lungs and Pseudomones on his skin.  His kidneys had begun to shut down and his blood toxicity was rising.  His Potassium level was sitting at 6.4, Normal is 4.5, and fatal is about 7.  The day before his Potassium level was 5.8 so it was climbing very quickly.

We had decided to not put him through much more treatment and let his body handle what was thrown.  If he fought it off, then he would survive.  If not, then we were at peace with the fact that we gave his body everything it needed to try its best.

The day we made those decisions, the rgood Reverent took us in for his annointing. 

Change of direction

Dad somehow started recovery.  We don't know how.  We don't know why but he did.

Now he is learnign to walk again and feed himself.  Walking farther then anyone had expected in the time .  We are dealing with a lot of hallucinations and confusion that is a combination of Alzheimer's, Morphine, and General ICU psychosis.

Future

Unknown.  He will be going to the Miller Center much earlier than anyone suspected for physio rehab, but a Geriatric Psychologist will examin dad to try and get a handle on the extent of his Alzheimer's.  Long Term care is coming, we just are not sure what kind of care he will need - yet.

Why Dad is missing the Daytona 500

Looking back at my life and what my Father has done for me over the years, I realize that we shared a few things that mean the most to me. Camping, joining Scouts, Fishing (something I now wish I shared more of a love for) and NASCAR. I remember spending many Sundays sitting with my Dad, watching various races with a special interest in the Talladega 500 and the Daytona 500. Dad called the Daytona 500 his Superbowl weekend. He would gather all kinds of information about the race from the papers, magazines and such. We would then sit and watch the Daytona 500. Specifically, I will never forget the sad day 2001 when Dale Earnhardt passed away. My Father openly wept as we all did. I, not only for the tragic loss of such a great man but for the effect it had on my father. He was devastated and wept again when he saw the reverse victory lap Dale Jr did after winning the 2001 Cal Ripken Jr 400 post the Sept 11 attacks.

My brother and I decided to take Dad to the Daytona 500 several years ago. Coming from Newfoundland, it would be a reasonably complicated trip, but one we decided we needed to make. We considered going for 2010 but decided to put it off and wait until we all had more time.

Well, Dad's spiral into Alzheimer's really started in December of 2009, and by July 2010, it was a serious issue. My brother took a job in northern Manitoba with his wife in July, but we decided that we had probably one last attempt to get him to the Daytona 500, which was for 2011. We booked the tickets at the end of October 2010. We had no idea of the tragedy that was about to unfold.

On Nov 10, my father was at his brother's place, keeping active and helping out. He somehow tried to light a stove and then subsequently caught himself on fire, causing him to burn over 60% of his body at 62 years of age. The prognosis was grim and bleak. I don't wish to recount the events of his battle, but rest assured, it will be written about later. He is the strongest man I know, and he survived such a physical tragedy. All those skin grafts and septic episodes should have taken him from us. At one point, he was anointed for death - but my Dad, somehow, fought back to the sheer amazement and shock of all the hospital staff. Dad never was and never will be a statistic of the masses.

Today is Feb 20, and Dad is in a hospital room still struggling with his Alzheimer's and learning to walk and feed himself again. I sat with him today and watched some of the Daytona 500 on the little TV screen at his bedside. Dad never mentioned that we were planning to go, even though he was so excited about it before the accident; he only told my uncle that he would love to go. During the pre-race, the tribute to Dale Earnhardt was running, and I noticed my Dad filling up and shedding tears again. He is still connected to those events and that time, and it still profoundly impacts him. He drifted off to sleep a few times, and I left him alone to rest. I left him to rest but spent my day emotionally disconnected and sad. I love my Dad. I know it is hard for anyone to lose a parent and something we all must face in one way or another at some time.

I don't know how to express my sadness for him and this situation, but my family and I would appreciate it if anyone from Hendrick Motorsports (big fans of Dale Jr, Mark Martin, and Jeff Gordon) or from the NASCAR community could send us some signed items or a picture. Anything for him will go a long way. I know it is a lot to ask, but with his lucidity slowly slipping away, there may be little chance for anything like that to impact him over the next year.  If anyone can dig up a shirt, Dad usually wears a Large (I am XXL - go figure)

I will graciously deliver anything to him at the hospital he is in at the time.

Graham Dawe

C/O Jason Dawe

7 Steadybrook Rd

Conception Bay South, NL

A1X 2L4

We would have been there today on the 10 anniversary of Dale Earndhardt's tragic accident to live his dream and share in the anniversary. I was there today in thought, and I know my Dad was too - in his own way.

Dad and my son Jack flying a Kite, May 2010. It is one of my favorite pictures of Dad of all time.

Dealing with tragedy

You know, when something happens in life that you do not expect, you sometimes react differently than you would ever have expected to. 

I got the call about my father's accident at about 3 pm at work on Nov 10.  He was on his way to the hospital having suffered burns after trying to light a fire - we assume.   I went to the hospital and met the ambulance as it arrived.   The smell of burnt rubber and melted material dominated the Emergency Department.  

When I saw him he recognized me and we exchanged a few jokes about me taking his wallet.   It was the last time we spoke as he was placed on a ventilator and has been sedated ever since.   I wish I had said more.  I wish I had said, one more time, I love you Dad, everything will be OK.   I wish I had of did that.

Now I am limited to seeing him through a glass wall at the ICU watching him breath and observing the lights and monitors.

More to follow soon.